Valentine’s day is not everyone’s cup of tea. For those in fresh romances or long term relationships, it can be a day filled with fun and celebration. But for others who are single on Valentine’s Day, are going through a breakup, or simply struggle with the idea of the holiday, it can be a downright horrible time of year. But there are things you can do to make February the 14th more fun, even if you aren’t going on a date or exchanging gifts. Here are some tips on how to make the most of Valentine’s Day when it’s your least favorite date on the calendar.
One of the easiest ways to keep from wallowing in negative feelings is to give yourself no time to wallow. Schedule your day on February 14th more meticulously than you normally would. Start when you wake up, and plan all the way until bedtime. You can look at it as a great opportunity to have a productive day! Pack your to-do list with things you’ve been meaning to tackle. Reorganize your living space. Run those errands that you’ve been stowing away in the back of your mind for months. Avoiding your feelings isn’t always the best plan of action, but sometimes, distraction is necessary for your mental health.
Celebrate the non-romantic love in your life.
Of course, Valentine’s day is all about romantic relationships. But sex, dating, and romantic commitment aren’t the only ways that we experience love in our lives. You can still celebrate love on February 14th, whether or not you have or even want a partner. Maybe take some time to reach out to members of your family and celebrate the special relationships you have with them. The kind of love that exists between family is unique and worth acknowledging any time of year!
If your family isn’t a go-to source of love for you, celebrate other non-romantic relationships that you have in your life. Hit up your friends for a quick chat. Commiserate with your favorite co-worker about the annoying parts of your job. Bake your favorite neighbor some cupcakes if you’re so inspired! If your pals happen to be busy with other plans, maybe take some time to write them a thoughtful letter or email expressing how important they are to you. Using your love language to love on the people that make you smile is a sure-fire way to quell your V-day blues.
Practice self-care and self-love.
The most important relationship you’ll ever have is the one you have with yourself. Whether or not your single on Valentine’s Day, consider it a time to put a little extra effort into nurturing your personal wellbeing. Put all the focus on yourself this February 14th, and give a conscious effort to making yourself feel good. Stay away from social media— if you struggle with V-day, it likely won’t be a happy day of scrolling for you. Engage in activities that you truly love. Meditate, create art, get active, take a bath, listen to your favorite songs. You could even cook yourself a romantic dinner for one. Whatever it is that makes you happy, do it on this day.
If you’re feeling it, set up a super special self-love session. Masturbate with more intention and care than you normally would. Set the scene. Maybe incorporate a toy or some erotica that you normally wouldn’t find the time or reason for. Just because you don’t have a partner doesn’t mean you won’t have several orgasms on the holiday of love.
Embrace the darkness.
If every method to remain positive fails, and you can’t escape the bad feelings you have pent up about this holiday, then lean into them! There’s something to be said about letting yourself go through it. You can feel all these feelings, have a good cry, and then channel all of that angry energy into something light-hearted and fun. So how exactly can you have a good time on Valentine’s day while still being totally anti?
Read about celebrity breakups.
Sure, there’s a tad bit of schadenfreude involved in this one, but seeing that people with seemingly perfect lives struggle with love the same ways we do is refreshing! It’s also a great reminder that breakups are not always an inherently bad thing. Separation can be a positive turning point in peoples’ lives. There is always sunshine after the rain and watching your fave celebs bounce back is a great reminder of that.
Have a horror movie marathon.
You’ll definitely want to steer clear of all cheesy rom coms and love songs for the day. So head in the opposite cinematic direction and kick back with a scary movie marathon. Pop some popcorn, grab a blanket, turn off the lights, and let Jason, Freddie Kruger, and the Babadook be your valentines.
Have a single-friends-only zoom.
Misery loves company, so if you don’t want to be alone, round up your single friends and party the night away virtually! You can share breakup stories, discuss unattainable romance fantasies, or talk about how awesome being single really is. Not everyone loves this holiday, and the truth is more people hate it than you think. So why not come together in solidarity against it?
In any case, whether you’re single on Valentine’s Day or simply don’t vibe with the holiday, there are ways for you to thrive (or simply) just survive these paper heart-filled 24 hours.
Laurie Magers is a comedy writer and actor living in Los Angeles. Her favorite color is red and her favorite food is crab legs. Check out more from her at www.lauriemagers.com.